ends.....

it's coming to the end of my holidays.... and left few more days... sch reopen again.

this is my last day in home, and will be going off tmr. so miss everyone in kuantan. i wish to celebrate my christmas eve in kuantan, but, no choice lah... i also wish to stay in home during christmas day... but.... cant also. cause have to go to cameron highlands. and going back penang on sat.... haiz... complicated feelings... so wish that i can go back later.......

to all my dearest frens in kuantan, take care and will see u all again next year... when my sem end... and wish everyone Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!!!!!

HolidayZ.........

time flies... and it's already pass 2 weeks... sem break will be end soon...

new semester, new starts! this holiday, didn have much travel. went to KL and met my dearest frens and we hang out together! we had fun! haha......

back in hometown, nothing much to do... hang out with some of my frens too... miss them a lot. and really happy to see them again. it's been a long time i didn see them. come back of course have to find them out...... cause i will know that next semester, i will not be around until the end of April or May... what happen then we do not know........

recently, watched 2012 twice... and i felt that... what happen if end of the world? does everyone will not live longer? will it be oni the richest person who deserve to stay? this i do not know the answer... but, what i can say is..... appreciate what we have now, appreciate this moment... save some times for our family, besides our frens also.........

do u feel that u miss something? or u wanna say something to some person? jz go ahead and tell them yr feeling...... cause we might dunno what will happen tmr? chances r always waiting for us... it's depends on us that we wanna fight for what we want or not...... so...... DO NOt MISS any CHANCES...

tell the one u love, how much u love him/her...how much u miss him/her.....
tell yr parents, thanks to them, and how appreciate r u.... how thankful are u....
tell the frens u loves, how greatful to have them around u....
times wont wait for us....... so grab any chances that we have it now........

It's Sunday Morning.......

wow..... it's really sunday morning.... and wat's our plan for today??????

Yeah..... we last nite talk abt some plan during dinner with my few coursemates.... and we 1st plan to study until 5am, then walk down to have our earliest breakfast as usual...like last week..... but, suddenly, i got another plan for that.......

i told my darling, let's go jog at 5 in the morning,and then....... we go to eat dim sum near KDU College there...... so.... talk talk talk....... we put our plan at 6am...... and at 1st.... natalie really talk we r joking over there...... but..... we really did it......

we went out to stadium and reach there at 6am..... and then.... we start to jog and jog... until 7 something. after that, continue our journey to makan DIm Sum..... wow.... yummy...........

and now..... we all r still sitting in front of the computer.... and continue booming each other comments in facebook... good..... well done to us. and BRAVI to 5 of us...... Darling, Mama, Pui Yan, Adeline and me......

Continue our Study.......... Gambateh in the Psychology exam tmr......wuahaha...

有些事，一转身就是一辈子

recently, i found out a video... and mention something as i will post it below here...enjoy it...

有些人一直没机会见，等有机会见了，却又犹豫了，相见不如不见。 　　
有些事一直没机会做，等有机会了，却不想再做了。 　　
有些话埋藏在心中好久，没机会说，等有机会说的时候，却说不出口了。 　　
有些爱一直没机会爱，等有机会了，已经不爱了。 　　
有些人很多机会相见的，却总找借口推脱，想见的时候已经没机会了。 　　
有些话有很多机会说的，却想着以后再说，要说的时候，已经没机会了。 　　
有些事有很多机会做的，却一天一天推迟，想做的时候却发现没机会了。 　　
有些爱给了你很多机会，却不在意没在乎，想重视的时候已经没机会爱了。 　　
人生有时候，总是很讽刺。 　　
一转身可能就是一世。 　　
说好永远的，不知怎么就散了。最后自己想来想去竟然也搞不清当初是什么原因分开彼此的。然后，你忽然醒悟，感情原来是这么脆弱的。经得起风雨，却经不起平凡；本来风雨同舟，天晴便各自散了。也许只是赌气，也许只是因为小小的事。幻想着和好的甜蜜，或重逢时的拥抱，那个时候会是边流泪边捶打对方，还傻笑着。该是多美的画面。 　　
没想到的是，一别竟是一辈子了。 　　
于是，各有各的生活，各自爱着别的人。曾经相爱，现在已互不相干。 　　
即使在同一城市，也不曾再相逢。某一天某一刻，走在同一条路上，也看不见对方。先是感叹，后来是无奈。 　　
也许你很幸福，因为找到另一个适合自己的人。 　　
也许你不幸福，因为可能你这一生就只有那个人真正用心在你身上。 　　
很久很久，没有对方的消息，也不再想起这个人，也不想再想起这些事了...

so, everyone,really..... appreciate wat u r having now.....dun feel regret when u lost it....
it is because u didn appreciate what u have it b4........

23/10

finally, done........
2 assignments passed up, a few exams is done.......
but, the results was bad...... still need 2 work up to achieve my goals...
hmm..... gambateh ne.....
still got 1 more week to go..... and it's the time to face the fact......
it's the final... and it will justify is it i was good or bad.....
exams that passed was not really good..... i didn done well on it... didn work hard on it.....
urgh..... always last minute and do all those things...... really really bad......
i hate myself very much..... y cant i change my attitude... and be hardworking a bit?
that's y...... simply do... and simply get a marks... urgh!!!!!
and the same word still......
i m still missing someone...... someone that i cant let go until now......
yet..... if i really wanna let go..... i wont wait until now also cant let it go.....
all my frens told me...... that i need time to let it go.....
yes... i know it...... but i jz cant do it.... and i really not willing to do so.......

it's another nite

yes... sendiri cari pasal...

2 assignments need 2 be hand in next week... not done yet......

going to have 1 listening quiz next week... not done....

going to have 1 final exam next week... not finish practice...

2 more exam next week... those still okoklah... hope will be fine...

study week for 1 week... go back home and study...

final exam will be coming soon.... 3/11 until 17/11....

goodluck to all my dearest coursemates in all the assignments and exam lah...
wish me got a good idea for my assignments... really dunno how to pass up if didn finish...

21st birthday.....

Oct 5th, i've been through a happiest birthday in my life...

this is the year, that i can cried in front of my friends, jz because of a suprised birthday cake...
it makes me cried out, with a touched feeling... really thanks to them...

that's the day, i've been gone thru a sad moment... it is because of someone... been talked in phone with my good gor gor.... really thanks for his comfort... and i will remembered his words... and i hope he's fine in his relationship too... all the best to him...

i felt that, when someone grow up older and older, their problems will grow more and more... it's the time for me to let go everything, put down all the things and be a new person... i really hope everything can change after next year...

it's so suffer to keep on waiting... although i already knew the answer... but, i really cant give up... i tried to... if i can giv up, i already giv up last year. but things still run in my mind, and something ask me down let go 1st... so... i will jz wait... and wait... wait for the answer frm someone.......

in this birthday, i oni realize... family is very important to us... frens too... without them.. our life will be dark in colour. but, becareful to get a fren that u really trusted so much... at last, this fren might be harm u.... this is wat i think...... and frm this birthday, i oni realize, wat is true friendship. and i can say, i really cant believe in friendship at this moment. my heart was like killing by someone... because of someone, it makes me feel so sick abt it..... i hope that this someone can realize, problem is not me, is always u who create all the problems... if u really wanna go somewhere, u must think abt the future from now on... at least, respect yr family members 1st... that wat i learnt from all the days i live without parent beside u... yes, parent will always protect us... but, if u still not awake, and not realize u did wrong, how u ask yr parent to protect u? yr parent will jz feel dissapointed to u..... take it as an advice, and learn from the mistake u had made...

it's morning.....

today, i m so tired....... but...... i cant sleep... i do not know what happen to me...

is it i m wrong to view his profile? shud i stop viewing his profile? urgh! hate myself... thot i can let it go..... but i cant......... i feel so speechless......... few more days, few more days only...... and wat i reaaly wish is that, he can wish me happy birthday...... in what way i dun mind.... if his wishes arrive, i bet... i bet that it will be my biggest present that i ever had.... but now, i really dunno where is him? where he went? i didn had his news since that incident happen. i know that he hate me..... and mayb he will forgotten me......

i wanna change num, but i cant... i scare he will find me back when he's back....... i wanna forgotten our promises... but, when i forgotten everything, i oni realize that..... i cant even forget it.... it's always in my heart.yeah.... it's hard to forget abt it.... and i really cant forget........... i hope that i can eat some medicine, that giv me forget the pass... and move towards...

people always said, we should move forward, and forget the pass... yeah, i know abt it. if we didn walk out frm the pass, we cant see what happen in front of us... maybe got someone is more good than him? but, i m not sure.... cause..... all i know is that, he's the greatest 1 in my life...... and that is what i want in my life........ i hope that person will know this...

my 21st birthday..........

huhu..... finally finished my 1st assignment... hand in already... can put down a my burden a little bit... by no matter wat, still got 2 more going on... hmmm... i think after this, i can have enough of sleep liao...

well... after 1st week of sch, now i m in KL... cause, wanna celebrating birthday with my dearest bro in KL...

thursday nite, arrived in KL ard 12 something... didn go anywhere... come back home... straight away on my laptop and online, play Fish-A-Fish... hehe... my favourite games nowadays... thanks my darling for introducing me this game loh...hehe. Friday whole day, doing nothing in the hse... online, Fish-A-Fish... and my darling gav me a name "FISH QUEEN"...haha... i love to fish a lot.....hmm.....

well, time fly until Sat... yeah.. finally, i can go out liao...... in the afternoon, went to Pavillion. had a good lunch, and i m very very full... walked all the way to Sg.Wang frm Pavillion. reason is, i wanna go Chamber..... actually go there also no reason. but finally, i bought 2 books frm there... hmm.... walked back to Pavillion, and we r heading to MOF... a famous Japanese Restaurant, and famous with their Ice-Cream... yeah... love it so much......

in the night, went to The Curve... 2nd round...haha.... went to TGI Fridays as wat i wished since few months ago..... and this is the promises loh..haha... ate very full there... but at last, we went to Starbucks again... for another cup of coffee... sat there, nearly fall asleep... so so so tired... as the last nite... me and my bro didn sleep at all... we watched drama until 6am in the morning, we oni went to sleep...got a laptop beg in The Curve... gosh.... i m soo soooooooooo touched... thanks thanks thanks........

back home with full of tiredness... but i m appreciate a lot....... and i wanna thanks to my parent too... for the new hp they gave it to me..... love u all forever~!!!!!!!111

for someone i promised to meet them in KL, but at last didn meet... feel sorry to him..... i know he feel sad... but i got 'ku zhong' for not meeting you... sorry.........

and for someone now staying far away frm M'sia, i m so miss u.... the most regretful is, i didn tell u that i wanna celebrate my birthday with u.... but, u cant come back yet....... i hope when u back that time... u still can find me....... i miss ya soooooo much........

23/9

it's been a long time i didn post blog here...
well... a new sem started and i really do not have time to blog...
a lot of things happen in this sem... and some sad things happen also...
and it makes me really beh song with someone... someone who is selfish, didn think of other peoples, oni think of him/herself... hate the people like this... i feel so sorry to that person...
of course... i wont be my coursemates... cause i really do... do appreaciate them so much... love u all so much... u all now still always be there for anyone when we r having trouble... hard to find those coursemates... and i really sincere from my heart, appreciate u all sooooo much...haha
now is my 1 week holiday, jz back frm cameron, enjoy this trip... although have 2 do some assignment...hehe
and back to reality, have to rush up my assignment this few days, hate it but have to do it... after this holiday, have to pass it up...
and after this few assignments, have another 2 coming... and need me 2 do it...
gambateh to all my coursemates ya...hehe

世界上最遥远的距离

世界上最遥远的距离
不是 生与死
而是 我就站在你面前 你却不知道我爱你
世界上最遥远的距离
不是 我就站在你面前 你却不知道我爱你
而是 明明知道彼此相爱 却不能在一起
世界上最遥远的距离
不是 明明知道彼此相爱 却不能在一起
而是明明无法抵挡这股想念
却还得故意装作丝毫没有把你放在心里；
世界上最遥远的距离
不是明明无法抵挡这股想念，
而是 用自已冷漠的心对爱你的人 掘了一条无法跨越的沟渠。

my life 2008/2009

time fly so fast… now, i m having 2 months break for my 2nd semester break in uni…

well, throughout this year, i had been tasted the sweet and sour moments in uni… remember the 1st day i step into uni, i was excited but a bit upset. excited is i will study the course that i wanted for so long, upset is my distance between me and family is far away… yea, sister is more far than me… but for me, it’s still far, because this is my 1st time.

when the 1st day of the orientation, i knew that i cant stand for it… it’s too boring. and when the nite my mum called, i cried… because i m so miss my home. but no matter what, mum told me that, everyone is happy because they knew that i enter the uni that i wan, and the course that i wan. i shud be proud of myself. yeah, indeed, when ppl grow up, they need 2 leave their house and go 2 fulfil their dreams… cause, we cannot only stay in our hometown, we should go 2 explore… this is wat i learn…

so, during the orientation week, i get 2 know a lots of frens. and one of my fren is frm my hometown too… i feel that, with them, i can know that my uni life sure be happy… we eat together, go 2 those places together… and clean our room together when our 1st day move into our lovely hostel…. hmmm….

well… class started and i get 2 know my coursemates. they are so kind, care for each other. and i knew that, i can share anything with them. and i m so happy to know them. and then, time pass, i m so close with some of my coursemates, like hui yin(mama) and wei wen(darling)..haha… and also, cant forget, is dearest pui yan… she’s from management sch… no matter what, she still close with our music students… surprise huh…hehe… but we always go here and there together…

we ki siao together, go eat together, go shop together…aha… life is so meaningful… although sometimes we beh song or pek chek… we still will chat until ki siao… remember the 1st sem, me, mama and pui yan… haha… we nearly broke the uni’s record… if they read this blog, they sure will knw what am i talking about…

well, about my academics, i m so busy with it. i need 2 learn frm the beginning, frm the music history, to group piano, and to teaching… everything also need 2 learn…hmmm.. it’s hard though, although sometimes i wanna cry… but, i know that this is wat i want, and no matter how hard, i sure do it… and surprisingly, i took french class instead of japanese.. well, no matter how, i still can learn a new language…

remember those days i m sick in hostel, it was horrible day for me… fever, coughing, headache… and i really cannot eat anything. luckily i have mama, and adeline.. they borrow me their kettle, so i can boil water and take a hot shower. if not, with the cold water, i really cannot take bath. and mama also not allow me to take cold water as shower also..haha… i m super duper touch during those days… without them, i think i will sick and sick and sick until no need 2 go 2 classs..ahha

hmmm… 1st sem end, and me, mama and darling went 2 cameron. although it’s only 3 persons, but it’s really a memorable trip for 3 of us… so happy during the trip….hehe…. until our result come out, luckily, all pass and get a good result and successfully, we register our course for 2nd sem…. and indeed, 2nd sem start on the december 2008…

2nd sem, it’s a very tough for us… cause got aural, arrangements, again… learn new things… we r so busy with all the assignments. somemore got the Aural.. argh… hate it.. but, although we hate or like it, we still need 2 take it, because it is apart of our paper…haiz.. too bad…
but, we struggle it and done all the quizes that we had… done our 3 arrangements, and also our interview with the report… i cant believe that actually i can do all of this… in few months… if compare to last time, i need 2 take a year 2 do all this things… but, i cant, time force me to finish all this assignments…. i can take 9 hours 2 complete 1 assignment, but, result comes out, it’s so bad… until now, i m so sad with it… i really hate myself that time, ppl put a lot of hard work of it of course will get a better grade, but me, haiz… simply do mah get simply grade lor… this is me…

2nd sem is really hard for me, so, my frens know that i m totally moody… i know it can control and no need 2 show out.. but, i cant do it… i just dunno y… i will happy when i m really hapy, i will cry when i want to cry, and i m scary when i m pek chek that time… but, thanks 2 my frens, cause they can tahan me.

and i also wanna say sorry to my dearest mama, darling and pui yan also. sorry is because sometimes my moody,cause u all feel bad, and thanks 2 u all because u all always by my side when i m really need u all… i still remember the ice cream brought by darling, it’s so sweet…makes me cry even loud and let u c… haha… thanks for the hug… it’ s really give me a lot of encouragement… hehe… thanks 2 hui yin because always be my along, and this along didn kira “li si” frm me… thanks 2 pui yan, because gav me 1 packet of the sweets when i m not feeling well that time… so touch..haha… love u all so so much … Muackz… next sem come, we r 2nd year ady, no more 1st year, and we becomes ppl senior… or jie jie ady… so old… i cannot accept tim… it can prove that, times fly fast… we must appreciate our uni life… like i appreciate u all loh…

well, cant believe that, 1 year in uni, i realize a lot of things. time and place can change a person… yeah, what i said was true… he also agree with me. although i regret for what i done, and try 2 get it back, but at last, i cant… and i fail… all of these also because of my unmature thinking… and lose someone that i didn appreciate b4, but now… when i regret and wanna appreciate that time, it’s already too late… i m so sad when the time i told him all of these and the answer that he gave me was not i wanted… so… Appreciate what r u having now, don’t regret when lose it or when u let it go, because it’s will not come back to u…

now, he will go far away to study, all i want is wish him good luck and take care of himself. although i m not willing, but i will Miss you always…